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You might be a Deist if…
Long about 5th-grade history, as I recall, the teacher dropped a term on us I had not heard before. That term was “deist”. We were into the founding fathers of American independence, and our teachers...
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When I’m 64
Dean Porter and I skipped school that year to go see A Fistful of Dollars at the Wichita Theater. We lost Gus Grissom, Ed White and Roger Chaffee in a senseless fire during an Apollo 1 launch test, and...
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Mitch McConnell's Republican Party Can Meet Me In The Middle and Kiss My Ass
Reblogged from Margaret and Helen: HELEN: Margaret, it appears that rape remains unpopular among likely voters, gays are people too, and Rocky Mountain High isn’t just a song. It isn’t final yet, but...
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Elderly
[May be sung to the tune of "Tenderly", that great old American Songbook standard by composer Walter Lloyd Gross] You take a slip and break a hip. Elderly. Your still in bed. She thinks you’re dead....
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Roll Up a Doobie
As a salute to the voters in Colorado and Washington state, I have morphed yet another ditty to my growing collection, The Elderly American Songbook. The seed for this one is Bobby Vinton’s 1975...
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Sunday Morning Big Honkin’ Biscuits
BIG HONKIN’ BISCUITS as requested by Sally Midkiff Struck Sunday morning sausage biscuits made with Big Honkin’ Biscuits 2 cups flour — pick your poison; all-purpose, bread, whole wheat 1 Tblsp baking...
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(I’m Dreaming of) An Old Thanksgiving
Spatchcock the turkey, nog down some eggs…or shall we do ham instead? Thanksgiving seems no key, on its last legs…must we invite Uncle Fred? Such planning seems pointless, I mean, who gives a...
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From the bottom left drawer
Damn! Am I ever glad THAT(election)’s over! Hope your guy won ;0> Some years (all right, decades) ago when I was a country newspaperman running two weekly newspapers out of Quanah, TX, I had the...
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Get It Fast: GIFs for a nation with the attention span of a monkey
I may be old-school, but I try to keep up. Old writers can learn new tricks. Tackling one new topic every day or so not only helps one stay current in a too-rapidly-changing world, it’s essential for...
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Whine Country
For the sore losers petitioning to take their respective states out of these united states, let’s all pitch in to create an off-shore refuge and call it Whine Country. Such self-centered souls remind...
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A Bathroom On the Right
This selection for The Elderly American Songbook was inspired by a recent, 48-hour road trip with Allen Dean Porter, the Attention Deficit Posterboy. If that sounds harsh, get over it! Dean and I have...
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Balanced rock art is crazy stressful and crazy beautiful to look at
Reblogged from Grist: Watching artist Michael Grab balance rocks is really kind of stressful. He moves with excruciating care, holding a teetering pile of rocks steady with one hand while he adds yet...
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Oil shale: Energy’s pink unicorn
Reblogged from The Checks and Balances Project: Grover Norquist, founder of the right wing, anti-tax group Americans for Tax Reform, recently spoke out about the folly of spending tax dollars on pink...
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Morning broke colder than a witch’s tit
First snow of the season came falling yesterday, and this morning, again, broke colder than a witch’s tit. Which got me pondering, exactly where did we get this chilling yet less than logical metaphor?...
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What a friend we have in cheeses
Come on, now, fess up. Surely, I’m not the only hardshell Baptist child to ever hear “What a friend we have in cheeses” in that venerable Sacred Harp hymn. Cheese is older than recorded history,...
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A Word A Week Photograph Challenge – Blue
A Word A Week Photograph Challenge – Blue. Some of the most amazingly stunning photos I’ve seen anywhere!
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Is it Christmas without Bourbon Balls?
Soak your balls with shots of whiskey! Fa-la-la-la-laaaaa, la-laa-la-laaa! ‘Tis a treat to make us frisky! Fa-la-la-la-laaaaa, la-laa-la-laaa! Balls of chocolate laced with bourbon,...
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Geminids variations
Geminids? 2 fukN layZ ***** cloud cover warm covers lack of ambition another cosmic shower missed ***** Geminids shower mid December comes; Dry clouds shroud my patch of planet. My bed, beneath warm...
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Epicurious George
Credit for this little ditty goes to GOOGLE’s TV spot for its Nexus 7 tablet. There is a tune, living in my head; but since I can’t write music, you’ll just have to wing it if you want to sing it....
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One responsible gun owner speaks out
Under normal conditions I would not re-post a copyrighted piece. These shadow days following the Sandy Hook Elementary School slaughter are not normal. What follows was written by my good friend Nancy...
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